August 9th, 2009
Written by: Julie Cole
My cousin just had her first baby, an adorable girl named Claire Maeve.
It was discovered at an early ultra-sound that the baby was going to have a cleft lip. Although minor on the scale of things that can go wrong, it is still news that parents need to digest. The mama and papa (to-be) were amazing – they digested the news quickly, did their research, met with professionals and spent the rest of the pregnancy excitedly anticipating the arrival of the baby. This baby is definitely getting some family favourite status – she is the first grandchild on both sides, has loads of adoring aunts and uncles, and a handful of kids like mine all wanting a piece of her.
The day after Claire’s arrival, my three little ladies begged to go to the hospital for a visit. The new parents are good sports and confirmed they were up for some little visitors.
I had already prepped the girls about the cleft lip but thought I should do a quick refresher with them before heading over to the hospital to meet wee Claire. The highlights of the refresher course included information about what cleft lip is. I explained that her lip would look different to our baby’s lip and talked about the operation she would be having in the months to come. I knew they would worry that Claire’s lip would hurt, so assured them that Claire was in no pain at all.
Sounds like a fairly reasonable amount of information, wouldn’t you say? Well, apparently not. When we walked into the hospital room, the three girls ran over to the baby when one of them promptly gasped, grabbed my leg and said “why does her lip look like that?”
Are you kidding me? I went through that whole educational piece TWICE with the kid. I turned a slight shade of pink and gave a little smile to the new parents then went through the whole cleft lip explanation once again. The new parents were not even remotely fazed by the faux pas which is an early indicator that this parenthood stuff is going to come easily to them.
The third explanation did the trick then she immediately started fighting with her sisters over whose turn it was next to hold the baby. I guess the lesson here is that no matter how much you think you have prepped your kiddos, you just never know what they are going to blurt out. If embarrassing us is their job now, I look forward to the teenage years when the roles are reversed and embarrassing them becomes my job. I suspect I will find that new role quite fulfilling.
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April 26th, 2009
Written by: Caitlin Madden
It is with great excitement that Julie Cole and “daddy-o” welcome their sixth beautiful child into this world, proving that six c-sections is possible!
It’s a boy!
Name Finian Aloysius Cole O’Keefe
Weight: 7lbs 6oz.
The sibling team of brothers Maginnis and Clancy, and sisters Posy, Spencer and Jessamy are delighted with their new brother!
And of course, everyone at Mabel’s Labels is thrilled to have a new little Mabel baby to spoil!
Big thanks to all who have followed this pregnancy with interest and care. It has been fun sharing it with you. Now, let the real games begin!!
Enjoy guest blogger, Katrina Carefoot for the next couple of weeks and Julie will be back on the blogging board very soon!
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March 15th, 2009
Written by: Julie Cole
I felt young when I had my first baby. I was in my late-twenties but had always imagined I wouldn’t get started until I was in my thirties. You see, I just had too much to do and didn’t need a baby slowing me down. Turns out, sometimes they don’t slow you down but speed you up. Regardless, as time passed and the number of babies increased, so did the number of candles on my birthday cake. Last week I blew out 38 of the damn things.
Generally I’m not bothered by aging. We all know that 40 is the new 30 and having babies a little later in life is getting more and more common. I went into this pregnancy feeling well and up for the task.
But the issue of maternal age has always been a discussion point. In days gone by, the older mother was frowned upon. My grandmother gave birth for the last time at the ripe old age of 46 and was subjected to some pretty rude comments. While in hospital delivering her last baby, a nurse scolded grandma telling her that she should be “ashamed” of herself. In addition, she had to cop the grief of some of her embarrassed teenage/adult children.
While those social stigmas may no longer apply, maternal age is still relevant. Somewhere between my fourth and fifth pregnancy, I reached the magical age of 35-years-old. Apparently from there on in, it all goes down hill for pregnant women and their fetuses. I began being treated as though I was elderly – amnio offered around every corner and suggestions of a tubal ligation during the c-section to avoid another pregnancy at this late stage in life. It seemed odd to me since I had been pregnant with my fourth child only a few months earlier. Apparently my 35 candles put me into a whole new statistical category intended to scare off the faint-hearted mamas.
It’s one thing not to be bothered by becoming a mother in your late thirties, but another entirely when you have to surround yourself with young mothers. For those who have followed this blog, you may recall that there have been three recent weddings my children have been involved in. Well, my three bride cousins have now either just given birth or are just about to. Did I mention that these bride cousins were born in the 1980s?
So if you happen to be at a park this summer and see three energetic new mamas looking like teenagers with their noticeably absent crows feet, those are my cousins. You’ll easily recognize me with them – I’ll be the old hag with the bags under my eyes.
Yes, those Brides who look more like Jr. Bridesmaids are going to be mamas!
February 22nd, 2009
Written by: Julie Cole
I just received an e-newsletter from a pregnancy website that I didn’t sign up for. My subscription could be the result of one of my hilarious Mabel’s Labels co-workers thinking I should be following this pregnancy of mine a little more closely.
My first e-newsletter arrived congratulating me for being 30 weeks pregnant. I did the math which confirmed that the website knows more about my pregnancy than I do. It went on to tell me how I should be feeling – which is bad. Each day should now be greeted lethargically. Varicose veins should be plaguing me, along with the inability to sleep and the constant urge to urinate. This coming week I’m told to look forward to stretch marks, and the word “gassy” came up on several occasions.
And here I’ve been going along feeling great and largely forgetting that I’m actually brewing a baby. Time to start pulling rank, I say. I’m going to commit to some waddling and maybe groan when I go from the sitting to standing position. Hey, I’m 30 weeks pregnant so fully entitled – my new e-newsletter told me so. Take that Mabel gals and see how much fun I am to work with now. That little e-newsletter thing really backfired!
My e-newsletter also informed me that my baby is now the size of a squash, which erupted controversy among the other 30-week e-newsletter subscribers. There were no less than 47 comments from the moms-to-be expressing passionately either for or against the baby/squash comparison. With so many opinions on the topic, I was left thinking that this was a case of hormones gone wild. I tried to have an opinion, but nothing happened. Does this mean I don’t care as much as they do about my squash….er…..I mean, my baby?
The next part is what really freaked me out. It provided me with a link to my personalized pregnancy to-do list. It looked like this:
Number of items on to-do list: 78
Number of items completed on to-do list: zero
Yes, apparently I have 78 things left to do before I have this baby. I can’t even bring myself to open the link to my list. As someone who is now 10 weeks late for her first obstetrician appointment, I can’t start stressing about pulling out my little sleepers from bins in the basement and whitening my whites.
Mamas have about nine months to prep for baby. While there may be about 75 things left on my official ‘to-do’ list on the day this baby arrives, I have a feeling we’ll somehow muddle through it.
**The pic is of me 38 weeks pregnant with some other baby…..probably thinking it would be my last pregnancy so got the photo done!
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December 14th, 2008
Written by: Julie Cole
I quite accidentally had my 20-week ultrasound this week. Because I am overseas at the moment, I was just going to give the whole thing a miss. Minor complication came up so the Doc ended up sending me for an ultrasound here. All is well and I enjoyed what will likely be the last ultrasound in the career of this tired uterus.
The ultrasound tech was keen to know if I wanted to know the gender of the baby.
My answer was as it always is: a definite NO. The ultrasound tech nearly hit the floor because she said that 99% of women in my situation are anxious to know. She hit the floor a second time when I asked her to write down the gender and put it in an envelope for me to hand deliver to my MIL. Apparently, that was a first for her.
I never find out the gender, but always allow my elder women folk to know. Nan and Oma are very tight-lipped and have never blown the surprise for me. I’ve also noticed they are more likely to engage in a bit of pre-birth grandmotherly shopping if they have the required info, which is always a good thing.
I don’t find out because feel like there are just too few surprises in life. As a c-section mama, I’ll know the birth date and having done this five times already, I know the baby will be just below or just above 7lbs. I even know what it will look like. If immediately after birth the baby was thrown into a nursery with fifty other newborns, I’d be able to pick mine out in an instant. So, there’s not a lot of mystery involved.
In addition, I really just don’t care what I’m having. I’ve got plenty of both but even if I had a single gendered family, I doubt I would be too invested in the gender. My SIL thinks that everyone secretly wishes for a specific gender and asked me to dig deep and tell her what I really wanted. I mentioned that a boy would be good for bedroom sharing reasons. Then I said that a girl would be good because there would be less worry about autism. I suggested I might have a better idea later in the pregnancy based on whether I’m happier with my girl or boy name choice. My SIL clarified that those reasons don’t count – the answer had to come from just a secret desire based on no practicalities. As such, she’s still waiting for my answer and I really don’t think I’ll be able to come up with one.
Another reason for not finding out is that I absolutely hate having the c-section. Lying on the table with the awareness that my guts are wide open really does my head in. Being able to look forward to the gender surprise is a good focus point for me while I’m freaking out about the actual c-section procedure.
I know it sounds cliche, but for many mamas like me who have experienced having a child with health or developmental issues, my true desire has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with health. I don’t feel like I’m in a position to get too much fussier than that.
* that is not a doll in Posy’s arms, but the baby who is soon to be de-throned.
**HUGE thanks for the support from all of you. The Mabelhood won best family blog in the Canadian Blog Awards!! THANKS!!!!
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