Soon into our Hallowe’en night trick or treating adventures, my three Biggies ditched me and the smaller siblings and hit the neighbourhood with a couple of cousins. The five master trick or treaters went off into the night with a plan – to collect as much candy as humanly possible. There were strategies and maps – and they identified speed and perseverance as keys to their success. They factored in occasional pit stops to drop off their current candy load so it wouldn’t weigh them down, thereby slowing them. After three hours of relentless hitting of pavement, they returned home victorious – pillowcases full of loot.

I’m like most parents – I look at all the crap and wonder what the heck we’re going to do with it. Two weeks ago I found the last remaining bag of candy from last Hallowe’en hidden in the back of a bedroom closet. I hope never to relive that experience. Parents have varied opinions about how to deal with the sweet treats – divide it into portions, have them gorge themselves sick, steal the good stuff when the kids are in bed, or donate it.

Although my kids love sweets as much as the next guy, I know that Hallowe’en is more about the hunt. When I heard that a local dentist set up a candy buy-back program, I knew that my kids would love to get in on that action. Now they’d be making cash for their hard-earned candy. The dentist offers up two bucks for every pound of candy, then the dental practice donates it all.

My theory that trick or treating is all about the hunt was verified when the kids divided their haul into a ‘keep’ pile and a ‘sell’ pile. The particular child pictured ditched two full shopping bags of candy, and kept only the one very small package she is holding in her hands. The other kids were remarkably similar.

What did you do with your loot? Do you have super-motivated Trick or Treaters or are they more the ‘hand-the-treats-out-at-the-door’ type?

Christmas is quickly approaching, yes like 7 weeks away! We are starting to get our gift  shopping done and preparing for the weeks ahead. When I think of gift giving my thoughts keep going back to those children at the orphanage in Haiti that were just in awe over their labels. I think back to times when I have received personalized gifts. When I was a little girl my Grandparents sent me a set of pencils with my name etched on them. My cousins and I spend time every summer at my Grandfather’s house and he has always had towels embroidered with our names on them, and as we got married and had children had towels made for them as well. Later on we spent Christmas there and all of our children’s stockings had their name embroidered on them. It was really something quite simple to do but that little extra effort just made us all feel so special.

The Mabel’s Labels Loot Bag Combo is a great gift at Christmas if you want to go for that personalized touch. The children’s faces just lit up in Haiti, “that’s me!” they would say. Something undeniably belonging to them. This year why don’t you share a personalized gift!

Instead of using a gift tag you can attach a Loot Bag Combo and write who it’s from on the back. If your kids are in sports or Scouts or anything like that it can be expensive getting individual gifts but these are the perfect size and price! Also, great for giving to teachers. Last but not least this little pack of labels is the perfect size for a stocking stuffer!

Can you think of any other creative ways to give labels?

This past weekend I was supposed to go on my first “girls weekend” in three years. Instead, I was sick so lounged on the couch with children piled on top of me. But, I did pull up one of my old posts and reflected upon “The Rule”. How much do you talk to your friends about your kids?

My ninety-two-year-old grandmother has given birth to a lot of babies. She had babies in the 1930s, 40s, 50s, and 60s. She was collecting the baby bonus and old-age pension at the same time. Grandma is as wise as she is old, so when she talks, this humble creator of five babies drops everything and listens.

Grandma thinks women should not gather and talk about their kids. At first I found this to be a very strange perspective. I have five small kids and can turn every conversation into a discussion around their accomplishments, challenges, teachers, activities, poops, pukes, and sleeping patterns. What more is there going on in my life? If not for kiddie-gab, is there much else I can say?

That is precisely her point. I once returned from a weekend away with my longtime girlfriends. You know the kind of gals I’m talking about — the ones who have been around since the beginning of time. They were there holding your hair back while you puked up the peach schnapps you guzzled in the school parking lot before the dance. They remember when you got your driver’s license, cried with you that first time your heart was broken, and would share your single dorm room bed during a weekend visit. These are the gals who were your bridesmaids and actually knew what you were like before you were someone’s mama.

The weekend was geared to be a fantastic catch-up with the old gang and Grandma gave me strict instructions to report back to her with all the gossip and antics the weekend held. However, come Monday morning, the two of us sat with our cups of tea and I delivered a shockingly boring report. I walked away from that weekend knowing that Little Johnny was an exceptional reader and Little Janey is the best player on her soccer team, but didn’t know much else.

Lamenting this, Grandma perked-up and told me it was time to implement “The Rule.” As a young mother, Grandma occasionally gathered with a group of women. It was one of the very rare occasions they did not have their children with them. She set a rule for the group. No one was permitted to talk about her children. “The Rule” was complied with and these women enjoyed many years of social gatherings, discussing every topic imaginable — except their kids.

The next year came quickly and our annual weekend together was around the corner. The e-mails started flying — deciding who was driving, who was cooking, who was bringing the wine! Now was the time to suggest “The Rule,” but I was concerned with how it would be received. I was telling people I didn’t want to hear about their kids — the bonus was they didn’t have to hear about mine! The two childless friends immediately responded to me. I had been elevated to hero status in their eyes. The other e-mails started trickling in. Everyone agreed that it was time for “The Rule” to be passed onto our generation.

No one will dispute that your children are all consuming and have a way of taking over your entire existence. Even my grandmother would readily agree. I once heard someone say having a child is like watching your heart walk around outside of your body. True enough, but every once in a while you need to step back and find that little piece of yourself that sometimes gets lost in the school meetings, hockey practices, and music lesson drop-offs. For this busy mama, it is officially one weekend a year, but I try not to let the lesson of “The Rule” stray too far.

While you read this I am actually in Haiti for the second time this year. I am so excited to be traveling with Soles4Souls again to distribute shoes to the children there!

This time I brought a special treat for the kids at one of the orphanages we will be visiting. Their own personalized labels! The Loot Bag Combo was great for this! I can’t wait to see the kids faces when they get a gift personalized just for them!

I will share more about the trip next week when I return!

You’d think the statement “It’s not fair” would be commonly heard around our house. Strangely, it’s not. Or at least it wasn’t. I’m not sure why we had the good fortune of escaping it for so long, but it has recently become a part of our family’s vernacular.

It’s actually kind of surprising the kids didn’t think to use it before. I suspect there are plenty of occasions in our biggie-sized family that they could have. Like on movie night when I put out one big bowl of popcorn and it’s every kid for him/herself. It never crossed my mind to evenly divide the popcorn prior to handing it out, but now that my kids are dishing out the statements about fairness, who knows where this nonsense will take us? It never bothered me hearing other kids say it, but when it’s coming out of the mouths of my kiddos I get all anxious and uncomfortable. Believe me, it’s no fun raising children who sound like entitled little brats.

The thing that irks me most is their improper use of the phrase. When they say “It’s not fair”, what they’re really saying is “It’s not going my way right now” or “I don’t want to do it”. Often it has nothing to do with actual justice or fairness. In a fit of frustration, after hearing it again the other day, I decided to give the kids a tour of our house. I went through their bedrooms, looking out the window at their pool and trampoline. Then we peeked out the front to see the court where they spend their time biking, playing basketball and rollerblading. Next we wandered into the mudroom where their hockey bags are stored, along with dance shoes, baseball gloves and other equipment for the many activities they do. We walked over to the big harvest table where they gather to eat/waste beautiful food. And finally we wrapped up the tour at the kid-designated computer. We sat down and I pulled up images of children in Third World countries. If they want to talk FAIR, then it’s GAME ON!

So I’m done with hearing the word fair. Until they are able to use it in an appropriate and meaningful way, “fair” is a place they go to get cotton candy and ride on unsafe roller coasters. Fair or unfair, that’s how it’s going to be.

Mabel’s Labels student staffer alum, Nikki Cochrane, worked in an orphange where this little Emma is the newest arrival. Emma knows all about unfair.