Can you imagine saying something mean to that cute face? I did and it didn’t feel good.
Mornings around our house are always hectic. The other day, my five-year-old woke up excited that the long awaited kindergarten trip to the fire station had arrived. The best part – I was going along as a classroom volunteer. She is a real mama’s girl, so that was a pretty big deal in her little world.
This particular kid is a bit of a fashionista. By dumb luck, our kids ended up in a public school that has uniforms. As such, there is no real discussion about what kids are going to wear to school. However, my fashionista girl regularly express opinions about shoes, sweaters and coats.
On the day of the school trip, the morning was madness. I had to get the kindergarten kid and the three biggies out the door. The baby was screaming for breakfast and the pre-schooler had to get dressed for nursery school. I was under pressure for time since I had to get myself organized in order to be at school on time for the field trip. I handed my kindergarten kid her sweater with instructions to put it on and head out the door for the bus. She started fussing, complaining and carrying on about not wanting that sweater. I snapped. Out of my mouth came something that stopped her in her tracks. I said “If I get any fuss about this, I will not be going to the fire station”. She looked startled and quickly put the sweater on.
I consider that statement to be a perfect example of lazy parenting. Did I really just threaten to take away something so special to her – spending time with me? Did I really just serve up a threat I would not have followed up on? Yep and yep.
Half an hour later I was driving to the school with tears streaming down my face. When I arrived, my daughter’s little face lit up. I gave her a hug and told her I was sorry about the sweater incident and that I wouldn’t have missed the school trip for anything. She laughed and said “I know, mama!”
I’ve still got a lump in my throat as I type this, but I’m trying to remind myself that if my dear, sweet five-year-old can forgive me, maybe it’s time to forgive myself.
RSS
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Definitely forgive yourself. We’re Moms. We run short on patience and sometimes things come out of our mouths that we regret. You’re only human.
Still made me tear up because I’ve done it, felt it, and have guilt for it. Time to let go & move on as no doubt the kiddos have done
just makes us strive to do better when we do something so silly.
Yep, stick with the 5 year old’s philosophy – forgive yourself now. Believe me, there will be many instances when you won’t believe what’s coming out of your mouth. The best counter-attack? Raising your children to know that while most of the time you’re a wonder-mom, a very small amount of the time you’re just human. Teach them that now and save a ton of grief.
Yup, been there. Kids forgive and forget so fast, and we’re left feeling guilty, and hoping we won’t do it again. Being a mom is definitely the hardest job in the world, but the most rewarding.
Also wanted to post, as I noticed our kids go to the same school. Love the uniforms!
look at it this way….this was a big deal for you guys and she forgave you quickly….when she’s 15, there’s going to be some teeny tiny mundane incident and she’s gonna be mad at you for 3 days. does that help?
i think the most important thing was that you admitted your error to her. a lot of parents wouldn’t do that… it shows her that you’re human and teaches her a valuable lesson in admitting when you’re wrong
And I agree with Ramona…. it’s only human. And kids learn from these moments. My daughter still says, “I know saying ‘sorry’ will make my heart feel good with love, but it’s hard sometimes” ♥
DOnt feel badly. KIds are reslient, and with so many running around at your place, its bound to happen.
You kids love you, and i wouldn’t beat yourself up about it
yeah, Ramona’s right for sure….can only imagine how many of these to come, but this one hit me hard. Maybe it’s those big blue eyes looking at me as the words were coming out of my mouth and I couldn’t stop them. Maybe it was that she was so forgiving….Carrie Anne posted on my facebook about how important it is to say sorry to our kids. I think that was the one thing I may have done right out of this whole incident. Thank you mamas for being so forgiving! xo We’re in this together!!
And here’s the part I forgot about – just wait till you hear the awful things your kids say to you! And while you will know that they don’t mean it, and even when they apologize, the sting will remain. This is human nature. And sometimes it sucks. But I wouldn’t trade motherhood away for anything. The bad days make the good ones more worthwhile. It’s challenging and a crap shoot all at the same time. You’re doing great Julie!
holy cow, I forgot about all the mean things they are going to say to me, Ramona! I was a pretty nice teenager, but still I can remember holding my mom fully accountable if I couldn’t find the shirt I wanted. I think I may have even served up some verbal abuse for not being able to find the jeans I wanted for the school dance. Note to self – don’t take it personally…they don’t mean it. Thanks for the reminder. I can’t even imagine what the teen years are going to serve up. Yikes!
ahhhhhh, we’ve all been there. I find things like this are more likely to happen when I’m hungry, tired or rushed. The same things that trigger tantrums in kids can create bad behavior for adults as well. As others have said, you recognized it, admitted it as a mistake and clearly your little one has already moved on…thanks for sharing!