Myth-Busting the Big Red Guy

December 21st, 2008
Written by: Julie Cole

As your kids get older, it gets more and more difficult to live the jolly ho-ho lie. They start asking about the logistics of Santa covering so much territory in so little time. There is also the issue of time zones. If you’re not super sneaky, your little detectives soon figure out that mama and Santa have the same handwriting and wrapping paper. Then there are those tough questions around why we have to be charitable when Santa gives gifts to all the children of the world. Your more observant children may inquire as to why there are tags on some toys. Don’t the elves make them?
Since we have big kids followed closely by a handful of little ones in our family, I’m committed to perpetuating the myth. I find it truly obnoxious when big ones blow it for little ones.

Because we are overseas at the moment, I wanted to do the Santa thing before we left. I figured I had to buy stuff to keep them occupied on the plane anyways, so it was a case of two birds, one stone. We wrote to Santa kindly requesting an early present drop off in light of our overseas adventures. Santa obliged and dropped around many maze books, DS games and craft supplies. All went according to plan, but it opened up a whole new kettle of fish in the twenty questions department.

We had a family gathering a couple of days ago and the jolly guy made an appearance. Each child sat on his knee and if their faces could talk, this is what they were saying:
9-year-old: “OK, not exactly sure how you pull this off, but if that present is the latest Captain Underpants book, I’ll believe whatever you want me to.”

7-year-old: “hmmmm……who killed a white rabbit and taped it to your face?”

6-year-old: “I’m confused. I know I’m not supposed to talk to or accept gifts from strangers…..yet here I am sitting on this weird guy’s lap and he’s tickling me and giving me stuff. My parents are taking my picture and look happy. They have serious consistency issues.”

3-year-old: “I’m not going to cry this year, I’m not going to cry this year.”

2-year-old: “get me away from this freak. There is NO way I’m sitting on his lap! AHHHH!”

To add to the excitement, we are staying on a farm so Santa arrived to the party on a tractor. More consistency issues – sled or tractor, which is it folks? OK, so I may not have all the answers but I just pull out the old stand-by: “if you don’t believe, you won’t receive” which usually shuts down any doubters in the crowd.

Comments: 2

Boy or Girl?

December 14th, 2008
Written by: Julie Cole

I quite accidentally had my 20-week ultrasound this week. Because I am overseas at the moment, I was just going to give the whole thing a miss. Minor complication came up so the Doc ended up sending me for an ultrasound here. All is well and I enjoyed what will likely be the last ultrasound in the career of this tired uterus.

The ultrasound tech was keen to know if I wanted to know the gender of the baby.

My answer was as it always is: a definite NO. The ultrasound tech nearly hit the floor because she said that 99% of women in my situation are anxious to know. She hit the floor a second time when I asked her to write down the gender and put it in an envelope for me to hand deliver to my MIL. Apparently, that was a first for her.

I never find out the gender, but always allow my elder women folk to know. Nan and Oma are very tight-lipped and have never blown the surprise for me. I’ve also noticed they are more likely to engage in a bit of pre-birth grandmotherly shopping if they have the required info, which is always a good thing.

I don’t find out because feel like there are just too few surprises in life. As a c-section mama, I’ll know the birth date and having done this five times already, I know the baby will be just below or just above 7lbs. I even know what it will look like. If immediately after birth the baby was thrown into a nursery with fifty other newborns, I’d be able to pick mine out in an instant. So, there’s not a lot of mystery involved.

In addition, I really just don’t care what I’m having. I’ve got plenty of both but even if I had a single gendered family, I doubt I would be too invested in the gender. My SIL thinks that everyone secretly wishes for a specific gender and asked me to dig deep and tell her what I really wanted. I mentioned that a boy would be good for bedroom sharing reasons. Then I said that a girl would be good because there would be less worry about autism. I suggested I might have a better idea later in the pregnancy based on whether I’m happier with my girl or boy name choice. My SIL clarified that those reasons don’t count – the answer had to come from just a secret desire based on no practicalities. As such, she’s still waiting for my answer and I really don’t think I’ll be able to come up with one.

Another reason for not finding out is that I absolutely hate having the c-section. Lying on the table with the awareness that my guts are wide open really does my head in. Being able to look forward to the gender surprise is a good focus point for me while I’m freaking out about the actual c-section procedure.
I know it sounds cliche, but for many mamas like me who have experienced having a child with health or developmental issues, my true desire has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with health. I don’t feel like I’m in a position to get too much fussier than that.

* that is not a doll in Posy’s arms, but the baby who is soon to be de-throned.

**HUGE thanks for the support from all of you. The Mabelhood won best family blog in the Canadian Blog Awards!! THANKS!!!!

Comments: 4

Recession Babies

December 7th, 2008
Written by: Julie Cole

I was interviewed this week by a reporter doing an article on whether the economic recession would effect my decision about having another child.

Quite clearly, the short answer is no. I don’t let little things like common sense, birth control, and economic disaster stop me from having babies. I went ahead with baby #6 for several reasons.

First reason is I believe, that for the most part, children are as expensive as you make them. Sure there is that initial cash outlay with the first child, but if you go on to have several children you are really just getting more bang outta your buck. When I look at our very worn out bassinet, stroller, crib and change table, I feel like we got good value for dollar. Sometimes I think I’d like to buy a bigger house but then I remember that my MIL was raised in Holland during the war where she slept in a drawer in the kitchen. She has great childhood memories and turned into a fabulous adult. It is a good reminder that my kids will be just fine having to share bedrooms and household space. I suppose many families need to consider the additional daycare costs involved with another child, but with a family of our size it makes more financial sense to opt for a nanny over daycare so these costs do not increase as substantially.

Another reason the recession didn’t stop me is because I assume that some sort of economic crisis is likely to hit at some point while the kids are still on my dime. It would probably hit us harder when they are heading off to university or college one after the other, year after year. Having said that, I’m not adverse to having kids pay their own way through school. I somehow managed to get through my few degrees while working two jobs, managing a residence hall and still heading to the campus pub far too often. University is a great place to fine-tune their multi-tasking skills.

It has also become clear to me that the term “being able to afford” is relative. I may not be able to afford flashy cars and a closet full of designer labels, but I can afford to have another baby. Conversely, I have friends who can’t afford another baby but do head off for expensive family holidays and manage hefty mortgage payments.

Each family is best able to make the appropriate decision for their own situations. For me, the further I go along in this pregnancy and the more excited I get about meeting the new little person, the stronger my feeling is that I couldn’t afford not to have this baby.

Comments: 4

Leaving on a Jet Plane

December 3rd, 2008
Written by: Julie Cole

I just survived the day I spend two years dreading. Yes, two full years of dread for one day. There are others that I don’t particularly look forward, but they don’t even come close to this one. Second place goes to that day at the end of February when we have our annual puke-fest. There is usually one day of overlap when all children are simultaneously puking and pooping because of a nasty little tummy bug that is working the rounds.

So, what day could be worse than that you may ask? Well, picture my family on an airplane for 22 hours. Every second year we embark on a wildly stressful journey to spend the holidays with the in-laws. Mind you, once we arrive it is completely stress-free which is why I am willing to suffer through the getting there part. I recently wrote an article about this journey and it was aptly titled “Hell in the Skies”.

I made two observations during this most recent trip:

1) My new heroes in life are the people behind the Nintendo DS. I truly admire them and feel that I should offer up my next born child to them in thanks. I know having an electronic babysitter is frowned upon, but there is a time and a place – a 22 hour flight is such a time and a place. So to my friends at Nintendo DS, have I told you lately how much I love you?

2) You can actually get flight attendants to back down if you turn into psycho-mom. I had finally settled one very crabby kid to sleep. With seatbelt on, she was lying down beside me. We soon encountered a bit of turbulence and I was instructed to lift child upright. At that point, I invited nice flight attendant to arrest me, fine me or throw me in bad passenger jail because there was NO way that child was going to be disturbed. Yes, I was willing to risk a turbulence related injury – sleeping child trumped bodily harm. Any of you mamas who are game to travel with kids will understand that kind of desperation. Our nice flight attendant realized she was not dealing with a rational human so slowly backed away as not to make any sudden movements that could cause me to lash out.

So was it worth the two years of dread? All things considered, maybe dread is a bit extreme but at least if my expectations are low I am pleasantly surprised when I survive without throwing a tot out of the plane.

Fortunately, I now have four weeks of therapy to prepare myself to board the plane for the journey home.

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  • ABOUT THE BLOG

    The Mabelhood is the sum of all blogs, combining posts from Mabel Labels' bloggers Julie Cole, Caitlin Madden and a cast of guest bloggers. The Mabelhood documents the daily dramas of a group of people raising families and a label making business, plus everything else in-between.

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